A Recap

It's been eons.  Or so it seems.  I will bring up Blogger and know I have things to write and then nada.  Gotta do homework instead, gotta fix dinner, gotta go, go, go.

I visited my best friend in Washington for a week, and while it was a long time to be away from home and my cat babes, I enjoyed myself.  I also realized how fucking depressing it is for me in Texas living with Miles.  We get along fine, but what I didn't realize was how tense I am.  It's like a giant exhale when I was away in Washington.  Felt good.  Plus I was high for like 80% of the time.  FANTASTIC.

Found a strain called "Pennywise" that is a great blend of THC and CBD where you get a real nice relaxing body high and not a big psychedelic high and it's my new fave.  I also bought some vape pens, including Charlotte's Web, which is one I've been interested in seeing how it helps with pain.  However, my more speculative purchases were Moon Cycle Balm and an Indica "Relax" balm from Ceres Gardens.  I really like the Moon Cycle one, it's a split mix of CBD/THC, which THC on skin doesn't really do much, IMO.

Anyway, enough about drugs.

New job is going well!  It's fairly simple and straightforward, but I feel much more valued, as an employee and with the work I'm doing.  Which makes me feel so much better.  As it would with most employees.  I wish I made more money, but that will hopefully come soon enough.  Probably not with this position, but I do like my company and want to continue to move through the ranks. 

I've been catching up on a lot of podcasts and YouTube vlogs while working.  I came across the New Yorker article "Cat People", thinking it was actually about cat people, so I listened to that between podcasts...  Well, it's not about cats.  However, a great written piece, and also so familiar to so many women dating today.  I've never been interested in the New Yorker as a magazine, but I may have to check it out, especially if I can listen to the articles.  I'm not hip to the ways of tablet or online magazines. 

I'm currently giving Audible a try and listening to a book I wanted to read this year, "Behind Her Eyes" by Sarah Pinorough.  It's a little hard to keep up while I'm working, but it is providing entertainment. 

Miles comes home today from vacation.  I'm pretty bummed out about this.  I have thoroughly enjoyed the last 8 or 9 days solo. 

I'm excited for the new year, not because I have some lame "new me" planned, but because there shouldn't be as much fucking traffic and mania around the places I want to go.  Holiday traffic is the worst.  Also, the end of the year just seems like days get lost and merge into each other.  I don't know, you just kind of get stuck in a rut. 

I haven't sat down and made goals or plans for 2018, but I am excited because it's very possible that my best friend will be moving back to Corpus, which means I will stay in San Antonio for a few more years.  This is information that we should know in January, so that's exciting. 

I have been slowly making changes and adjustments over the past month, cleaning out closets, making space, organizing.  I have a box just about ready to take to Goodwill, and I will hopefully check that off my list this weekend.  Whenever Miles leaves, my normal routine takes over and I just love it so much.  My goal when he is back and for the new year is to stick to MY routine, not OUR routine.

The only other news is that I have been talking/texting with a guy.  I'm not confident it will go anywhere at this point, but I find him interesting, and we have a lot in common, most of all is this coincidence: He is also from San Diego, moved here with his girlfriend (who was from here), they broke up, now he is out here with no family or close friends.  That's pretty much me.  I find him attractive and definitely my normal type, and he is taller than me, which I love.  However, although he texts me "good morning" everyday, it seems like the only effort he really puts in.  He barely asks about me, even questions I've asked him.  So, I stopped asking.

I text with him occasionally now, but I don't want to date him anymore.  I wouldn't mind being friends, only because I do really need to make more friends.  That's the only reason I haven't stopped replying altogether.  I just don't have it in me to be in another lacking relationship.  I don't want to settle for just crumbles, I want full attention and interest.  I deserve it. 

I finished up Six Feet Under a week or two ago, and in the final season there is a scene with Ruth and George, they are arguing.  George is upset with himself and his condition, he says "I am so lucky.  I hate that I'm the lucky one.  No one's every lucky to have me."

If there is a next time, I'm going to be the lucky one.