Wow, it's really been a long time. I think I have about 5 posts that I've started, and then abandoned, mostly because they no longer applied. Getting back into the dating scene is hard, especially when you work from home. I am alone most of the time, and although I like it, I would also like to try and make friends here. My best friend is back in Texas, but she is about 3 hours away. I enjoy her visits, and will be going down to visit her soon, but I would also like to meet someone local that I could go to happy hour with, or do bar trivia, or just get dinner.
I do miss having Miles' companionship, but I'm glad he is gone. My therapist suggested I find a group style workout situation, which I do think would help me a lot, but price is a factor. I would really like to get back into hot yoga, but there is really only 1 studio that is close enough to me, and it's still pretty pricey, about $130/month. Which is not a luxury I can afford, especially without a renter. I mean, for that price I might at well renew my membership back at Lifetime, at least they only charged $99/month, and you have an entire luxe gym and yoga studio - that they keep warm. I tried a few yoga classes there and they were 'meh'.
That's not going to happen though. Gaining weight throughout the last year, I would be ashamed to go back to Lifetime. And that's a really shitty perspective to have that really fucks with your head. Everyone has setbacks, especially when it comes to weight loss. Besides, none of the people there are personally invested in you the way you are invested in yourself. It's definitely the culture bias of weight loss as success and weight gain as failure.
When I visited my best friend last year in Washington, I confessed to her that I was really ashamed for her to see me; the last time we saw each other in person, I had just lost a bunch of weight, and now I had gained all of it back. She accepts me for who I am, the person I needed to make peace with was myself, and that's still something I'm working on. I've at least made it through the forgiveness part. I spent so much fucking time punishing myself and being angry that I gained weight back and the first thing I had to do was accept where I'm at now, learn from it, and forgive. Not an easy process.
For my birthday (in September), I purchased myself a faux fireplace for 50% off on Amazon, and then a Margot purse I had been eyeing at TJ Maxx -- that I found on Poshmark for half price as well! I am very pleased with the faux fireplace, I will have to post pictures soon. Actually I should probably make a house tour blog or something. Although if you follow me on Instagram you've seen a bit of the house already. The purses, eh, it's okay. I had been using a Marc Jacobs Natasha previously, and although things were a little tight, that was seriously the most perfect perfect purse.
I have a couple MJ Natasha's on my like list that I am considering buying on Poshmark. I have the brown one, super versatile. But I'd really like to add a couple more, at least a black, and then a pop color. One things I've learned over the years, it's really not worth it to buy purses brand new when there are so many barely used ones online. I don't think I would ever buy a new purse again, unless it's from a TJ Maxx type store, where they are already fairly cheap.
Anyway, after my short trip to Utah this fall, I'm considering fostering a dog. It would be a big responsibility for me, but I have the time, and it will also get me out of the house more (walks, dog parks, etc). And I'm able to pamper a pooch until they find a forever home, and save some doggy lives. I would rather foster cats, even though it would be harder to integrate with my cats. Cats are such bitches sometimes. A dog could be challenging as well, but I don't think it will be too bad. Besides, my cats are super high energy, so it would be great if they helped each other burn it off. And if it doesn't work out, I can just bring the dog back to the shelter for them to find another foster family.
And that's about it. I stay really busy working on school work and things around the house. Hopefully today I will get around to painting the closets in the back bedroom (Miles' old room), because I'm moving in that room and will try and rent the room I'm leaving, which is the master bedroom with the newly renovated attached bathroom. I haven't even posted pictures of that yet. Yikes. I still have to prime the grout on one wall, then do some paint touch ups, clean, and move the cabinet I restored in there. Maybe I can stop being lazy and get all this done this week.... But I have so many Halloween movies left to watch.
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