Before I get into it, I came across Steve's profile on Tinder, that was interesting. I don't know why he is using old photos instead of the selfies that he sent to me when dating, which looked so much better. I swiped left (no), didn't block him. He can block me, I don't care.
The next weekend, I came across Adam's profile. What the entire fuck is this? A repeat of 2024!? Well okay. I mean, it's Adam, the best sex I had last year, the sex I fantasize about. I matched with him and a few minutes later he matched with me and messaged me asking how I've been, and then if he could text me instead of using the app. I agreed.
He told me that he was currently in New York and so surprised to see me on the apps, and that he thought I'd be "spoken for", which touched on a sore spot, like no, sorry, apparently I am unboyfriendable, so here we are. Even with you, guy who said that you "came to San Antonio for work, but didn't know at the time that you really came here for me". This is off to a great start. I took it as an observation and we kept talking. He told me that he would like to see me and perhaps take me on multiple dates, as he really enjoyed my company last time. He was supposed to get into town on Monday but asked if he could see me on Sunday, he would drive out a day early and we could repeat our first date at Dave and Busters, I agreed.
I did not ask why he never texted me again, and essentially went ghost. I was going to ask him in person. I swiped right on him and agreed to see him again because he is the best sex I've had, with one exception, and I can barely remember that guy. I know I am not a casual sex kind of gal, I know better, but I thought "well, if I can manage my expectations and just take this for what it is, why not? I'm always disappointed by dating, may as well have some fun with it". LOL.
Adam called me on Sunday, as our tentative plan was to meet there between 6-630pm, and let me know his GPS said he would be there right at 630pm, so not to rush. He asked me how life was going, and again how surprised he was to see me on the apps.
Moi: yeah, I was surprised to see you as well, I didn't recognize you (he had some very old photos on there), I thought you had blocked me
Adam: what! I would never block you, why do you think that?
Moi: because you ghosted me
Adam: I didn't ghost you, I read your last message and thought that you were just looking to date casually, and then saw you unmatched me on Tinder, and that's the kiss of death
Moi: I agree it's the kiss of death, but I told you in my message why I was unmatching you, and I told you that I was interested in you and wanted more, and would like to hear from you again when you're in San Antonio, and heard absolutely nothing
Adam: I honestly thought you were just letting me down nicely, women have said that to me before, and then never respond to me, I thought you were blowing me off.
You have got to be kidding. So, what is this, is he seriously playing the victim here? Like I played him? Be so for real right now! God he is a smooth talker.
I had to really think about how much I was potentially disrespecting myself for temporary fun with someone who literally disappeared on me. Ghosting is despicable behavior, so cowardly and disrespectful of other peoples time and energy. It really is, like you truly are a selfish cowardly piece of shit. NOW, I do believe in ghosting if there is a safety concern, but come on. My last message to him was very chill and understanding, in my opinion, he could have sent a simple message. However, for me, yes, I would be showing myself disrespect by giving him the time of day. He already knows I do not hold myself to a higher standard because I swiped right on him and engaged in conversation. But damn that man can fuck.
We all know, I'm not a casual sex girlie, but could I just try? Because I need my socks rocked right off, and it's a guarantee with him! We'll go on a date and have fun, and I'll just go to his hotel after. I don't work on Monday, so this works perfect!
I packed a tote with pajamas, toothbrush, mouth guard, melatonin and ear plugs, the guy snores horribly, and went to Dave and Busters. He was already there and had set up our pool room and was in the bathroom when I got there. I wore my burgundy colored jumpsuit from Old Navy, I really need to go shopping for clothes, everything I have is too big now. Maybe this weekend... Anyway, we hugged and chatted, played pool, then ordered some food. When we sat down I confronted about the ghosting again and he added on:
Also, you left the hotel room in the middle of the night, so I figured you really had no interest in me
Moi: you snored, loudly. I had plans the next day, I couldn't sleep, that's all that was. It still wasn't cool to just ghost me
To sum up, I had a good time with him playing pool. I knew I was going to hook up with him, whatever. He walked me to my car and gave me a hug and also going in for a kiss. It's nice being with someone my height, as Chris was shorter than me. I am still taller than Adam, as he is only 6 foot, but it's not noticeable.
Adam: Can I see you again this week?
Moi: Yes, I would like that..
Adam: what?
Moi: Well, I just, I mean, do you want to see me tonight at your hotel..? (I AM SOOOO SMOOTH)
Adam: OH, well, yes of course, but I had no intention of that when I asked to take you out, I just like spending time with you and enjoyed your company, but of course I'm not going to say no, but I don't expect it, but yes, I would like that
Moi: I would like it too
Adam: Okay, I will send you the address
I ended up taking a roundabout way to the hotel since I got lost, but made it after him and went up to the room. I asked if it was okay if I stayed the night and he said of course, he wants me to sleep with him. The sex was different than I remember, still amazing, but I guess my mind remembered his dick being bigger. I mean, it's still a great size, perfect even, but I guess things get skewed in your mind when you are fantasizing and then it's reality. However, the man loves to perform oral. Like he is INTO IT. I mean last year he did drag me to the end of the bed to go down on me, it was hot as fuck, but this was another level. The man was on a mission and he indeed did put me on the moon.
Between that night and the next morning, I must have come like 18 times, and had 2 orgasms. It was insane. I woke with the worst headache from likely dehydration, but also the intensity. I feel like he gets off more when I come than he does, he was pleasing me digitally and then said "fuck it, I deserve this" and did his drag to the edge of the bed move to perform oral on me again, it was... like I said, intense.
I liked sleeping with him, like the actual sleeping. I hated the hotel bed and had a hard time falling asleep, but he cuddled super close to me, holding me most of the night. When I got restless, he put his hand under my pajama shirt to lay on my belly, which was so soothing. This is something I do to myself when I sleep and I'm feeling lonely or anxious. The touch wasn't sexual, just comforting. He held me close at times, and loosely others, kissed my forehead randomly, ugh, fuck, may as well shoot me through the heart at this point.
It was also nice being with him because he worships my body. He noticed my weight loss when we were in the parking lot of Dave and Busters, saying I looked good, but still thought I looked good last year too, and doesn't want me to lose more weight because I am perfect now, but of course to do what I want. What I mean is that he likes everything about my body. I felt like Chris just accepted my body because I was there for him to use, but never really complimented me. Adam is not like that. I do not feel like I need to hide anything or be insecure about anything in his presence. It's so refreshing.
And look, I've been killing it in the gym and I personally love the way my body looks, but I am still working on things. I still have about 45 pounds to lose until I will be at my goal weight. I don't need a man to validate my body, but it sure as shit makes me feel great.
He had to get ready for work in the morning, and we were chatting about womens clothing, pockets and self defense
Adam: you know why women's clothing don't have pockets right?
Moi: no, why?
Adam: because then you can't carry your witchcraft items with you and cast spells, you know, sage, crystals, tarot cards
Moi: I don't need all that shit to cast spells
Adam: you don't?
Moi: No, haven't you ever heard of sex magic? I cast a fuckload of spells on you last night and this morning
Adam: Oh... you didn't need to do that
Moi: and why not?
Adam: I'm already under your spell
Awwwww how cute. He is such the smooth talker, like why say all that shit and be so cutesy when you just want to be casual? I don't get it. It's not like we are going to date seriously and have a relationship, even if I want that (OF COURSE I DO, I'M A SENSITIVE GIRLIE), why say it? It's so manipulative.
I saw a TikTok from a guy that says that it's better to sleep with women who you seduce or can trick them into thinking there is a future with you versus a girl who actually wants to only hook up. Something like the sex is better and she is less selfish. I wouldn't think that's how Adam thinks, just because he is the most unselfish lover I've come across, but maybe that is selfish for him. I don't know the purpose. I don't really want to waste my time trying to figure him out either.
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