I didn't stay the night. He asked me as I was starting to doze off if I had my mouth guard with me (why do you remember the most random things about me??), and I said no, as I wasn't planning on staying over. I told him I would plan for that tomorrow though. We made loose plans for the timeframe for our date and then he walked me to my car. I noticed the hotel room number when we exited the room.
Is the universe fucking for real right now? It was my apartment number.
Look, I understand coincidences, but Adam and I have had too many. The random summoning (yes, a joke, but it has correlated), the intense connection and similarities, the ease we have with each other, but how dare his hotel room number literally be the number of my home. This, UNIVERSE, is crossing the line. I'm not the biggest "signs" person, but I try to take my gut instincts and things I notice into account, and I was not amused. I mean, I totally was because I was going to ask him tomorrow if he was playing a joke on me, and it will just add to the sex magic mystique.
I wore an athletic dress I purchased from Old Navy in "Cherry Birch", which is a brick red color and matches my color palette so well. I'm obsessed with everything in this color. The dress hits me mid thigh and has a modest v-neck. I wore it with a chambray shirt and strappy tan sandals. October in Texas is still in the low 90's. The dress shows my legs, which he has admitted he has a weakness for. I haven't worn the dress out yet, and thought this would be a good opportunity anyway.
I packed an overnight bag and met him at the hotel, he was already outside and ready, met me at my car, and walked me to the passenger side of his truck to open the door for me. I brought the bag with us since I didn't want to keep it in my car while we were gone, the hotel is mid range, but near the freeway, really should risk leaving anything visible.
We chatted about our respected days on the drive, something about one of our past dates came up, the escape room. He had mentioned being impressed with my problem solving and skills at finding things in the room, and made some charming comment and I said something like "you could have fooled me, because you were sweet talking all over the place" and he asked me more about that.
Moi: "Oh come off it, the line you gave to the escape room host about us?"
Adam: "Oh when he was surprised it was only our second date, I think we're really impressive as a couple, we did great in that escape room together, I was very proud of us"
Moi: "I'm not talking about that, and yeah, I thought so as well, but the awwwwww line that you know was straight cheesy"
Adam: "What did I say??"
Moi: "the host asked us if we were from here and you said "she's from here, I live in Houston" and he asked "oh are you here for work, or are you here for Danielle?" and you said "I was here for work, but I think I was actually here for her and didn't know it yet", like COME ON, you had both of us starry eyed with your smooth lines, and then you GHOSTED me for an entire year!"
Adam: "Oh that was smooth, and HEY, we are here now!"
Moi: "yeah, because I fucking swiped right on your ass, when I saw you back on Tinder, but I doubt I would have ever heard from you again if hadn't, what the fuck!"
Adam: "You're right, I just, our dates were so good, too good to be true, and then we had the most amazing sex, and you left. I was going to call you, but my lifestyle... I've been burned before, and I just didn't think you'd want to be burdened with it, so I didn't call. I didn't expect you to even match with me, let alone look like your photos when I matched with you"
Moi: "I gave you no reason to think that"
Adam: "I'm just taking things as they come and seeing where this goes"
Moi: "Well, maybe next time we can try another escape room, one that isn't scary though"
We weren't arguing per say, we've already hashed this out, but I am annoyed about the comments and smooth lines he used at the time. Because yeah, it did seem like he wanted more and the way this "Howdy" encounter has gone leads me to think similarly, but that is what he is saying. His actions now, taking me out on a date, is following through, but fuck I don't know. I'm not putting stock into it, I'm just noting it for the record.
Anyway, I had suggested Pasha, of course my go to. But also, I had a hard workout and wanted something healthy. Adam doesn't really "do healthy", he is a bigger man, barrel chested, very blue collar-esque in my opinion. Our lifestyles are different. He was unfamiliar with Mediterranean food, and I asked if he's had a Gyro and he was like, oh yeah, I like those, so he's had something. That's a starting point.
We walked into the restaurant and the hostess was very complimentary and greeted us as "hello, lovers", like what is this? Adam stepped closer to me and said "we must look very good as a couple, but I think it's all you", okay sweet talker, I gave him a look, hadn't I just warned him about his smooth lines?? They gave us a back table with a booth side and chair side, I was thinking about the booth before Adam told me "I would like to sit at the booth because it faces the door, if you do not mind... I also get to look at you", like duh, but I do not mind. I prefer this behavior from men, protective. It's such a turn on not having to think. Even with the drive, not having to deal with traffic and feeling anxious because the drivers are so bad and construction is really confusing over there, but I didn't have to worry about it.
Instead of focusing on being detached, I just had a date, like normal. Like it would be with anyone else. Adam had his stories that he told me about different experiences growing up. I asked about his best friend, who he has told about me. I kind of wanted to ask if he told him he saw me, but I didn't want to seem nosy or lead into anything. I actually just asked how long they've known each other and where'd they meet. While we spoke back and forth sharing things, I noticed he didn't really ask me questions. Thinking back, he would follow up on what I said, but he wasn't starting new conversations, so things were naturally progressing from whatever we shared. I think it's just a different conversation style maybe, then again this isn't a first date, we've been there, done that. I think he is just naturally seeing how things progress when we communicate.
We talked about the gym, and he asked if I get stared at when I go. "I would literally be in the best shape of my life if I saw you at the gym, I would just set up on the treadmill behind you and stare" like okay. I told him no, that people stare occasionally, but I think it's more because I'm a giant and I look mean than anything else. He told me that I do not look mean at all, and I am wrong about why they are staring. To each their own. (I know I am beautiful, I know my physique is coming along to how I like, but I'm also 43, even if I don't look it since I take care of myself and my skin. I do not seek his validation or comments, but I do appreciate the hype from time to time).
We talked about our Virgo-ness, how stubborn and exacting we are. I told him "you know, I think we are very similar in certain regard, maybe too much" he found this curious as he merely raised the corner of his brow and mentioned how he's only really strict at work, and I agreed.
"You'd hate me at work" he said
Moi: "Oh, you'd hate me"
A: "I don't know if that's true, if you are strict and correct at work, I may like that" curious
Moi: "Oh would you now. That's an interesting turn of events"
A: "Well, you are probably not fucking around and that's what I am about"
Moi: "Oh no, I am not fucking around. Do it right with the resources available, there is no excuse"
A: "Ahh, see that's what I'm talking about. I like that"
Moi: "Oh, you like me being strict? Controlling?"
A: "well, at work, sure"
Moi: "Oh, so you're saying if I asked in the right way to bark like a dog for me, you wouldn't?"
Adam: surprised face "Ummm, I don't know, probably not? I mean, I'm a switch, but I, no.. maybe?"
Moi: "Hmm. Yeah, I don't think I could dominate you anyway, you're not a switch to me"
Adam: "How do you know?"
Moi: "I can tell. There's a line I can play with with you, but there is also a fine line that I cannot cross without you putting your foot down"
I really just said the dog part to keep him on his toes, always keep them guessing! Plus, I wanted to see what he would say, he is not dominate in the ways I'm familiar with or like traditional BDSM, maybe a pleasure dom, but he hasn't brought it up. He just seems manly to me.
Anyway. We finished our meal and left, he opened the truck door and said to me "I was hoping earlier that you would take longer putting your bag in the back there", I looked back at him and pulled my skirt down before getting in. Ass.
I asked him how old he was when he got married and he told me that story, they had only known each other 3 months before they got married since she got pregnant, but the relationship lasted for 10 years, most of which he was unhappy. He told me he wanted to break up with her after month 2, but had a feeling that she was pregnant and he was waiting for the Tampax box to be opened, and it never was and he was like "fuck", and did the "responsible thing". He asked about my marriage and I told him I was never married, and he seemed surprised until he said "oh, you guys just did everything but basically, because you bought a house together?" and I confirmed. He still managed to mention that he is surprised I'm on the market
Moi: "I'm not dating right now, I don't want to"
Adam: "I haven't been looking for a while either"
Moi: "but I have no demands or expectations of you, just so you know"
Adam: "and I have no demands or expectations of you, I just want to see how things go"
I just gave a hum back, I don't "see where things go" or "go with the flow" when it comes to dating. You want me or you don't, and based on actions over the last year, you don't. Your words paint a different picture, but your actions are all that count. I date intentionally, so if you are not intentionally including and considering me, there is nothing more for me to give than what he has already had access to. There is no deeper level he will get to, and I think that's enough for him, but I know it's not enough for me in the long run.
I was giving Amanda the run down about it and she responded that she is annoyed he isn't already trying to put a label on things and be with me when things are actually this good between us. We aren't getting any younger, and he is being dumb, especially since he's done all this and he obviously desires me. She advised that if I want to continue, just be detached and have fun, but don't take anything seriously, which she admitted is hard, but she is pissed off on my behalf because "in the back of my mind, I would want something more, and I think you are wanting that too". I don't know anymore.
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